Dear Mothers, get in the photos.

Here is, I suppose my open letter to all mothers - please get in the photos. The main reason why I started wedding and family photography in Rutland, was due to my love of people - more so, my admiration and love of mothers. I like to focus on mothers in my family photography because time and experience has shown me that mothers rarely get in the photos. So let’s dig a little deeper as to why mothers avoid photos and why it’s high time we mothers get in the photos more.

Mothers in photos: Where are you?

Motherhood is both a blessing and a dirty ten-letter word. You are meant to know what you are doing and you worry about E.V.E.R.Y.thing all whilst spending every hour with your baby, child and little person. When I became a mother, my life really did change. Nothing prepared me for it. None of the countless books I read, Netmums post or growing up in a large family. It was also strange that even though I had taught hundreds of children by the time I had my children, and had so many ‘wow’ moments as children grasped new skills when teaching, nothing was more awesome than watching my precious little person doing just that. So I photographed it ALL. I have hundreds upon hundreds of photos and videos of my children and probably 90% of the footage is of them not doing anything awesome at all! I love looking back through the family photos and seeing how much they have changed and when I do, I realise how much I no longer remember. Sleep deprivation is a killer and brain musher. I certainly do not remember my children being toothless or small. So I am thankful that I kept a photographic diary of both of them!

But, looking back through this diary I also notice one more thing... I was hardly ever in the photo. In fact, my photos included three people - my children and my husband. Where was I? I was the one wiping the noses, I was the one worrying about what to feed them, I was the one right behind them ready to catch them and I was always the one holding the camera. Meeting more mothers whilst raising my kids, I realised I was not actually the ONLY one. It was always the mothers holding the camera. I imagine a lot of mothers reading this right now, and I ask you, does this sound familiar? How often are you, mother, in the photos?

I am so thankful I have photos to look back and remember these times but, what will my children have to look through to remember me? What will they have to remember you? Dear Mothers, get in the photos, please.

As my photography skill developed, I knew I wanted to photograph people and I really wanted to focus on photographing mothers. I was absolutely over the moon that my very first client was a mother, a pregnant mother. She wanted to capture her growing bump and her toddler in a photo. I did my little dance (imagine Hugh Grant in 'Love Actually') and met them all with my camera. It was the perfect first photography session I could imagine. A lovely day, picturesque location and a mother who wanted to give the kids the best pressie she could - photos of her existence and special moments of the three of them, recorded forever.

Mothers make the most excuses when it comes to getting in the photos

As I built my family photography in Rutland, I did quite a bit of research and I found there were many of the same reasons which I kept hearing that would prevent a mother from out from behind the camera and getting in front of it. They were many of the same reasons that had made me reluctant too. It was never about the price or finding the time. It was always about confidence - or rather, lack of confidence. We were all waiting to lose the last 5lbs (or 10lbs in my case), we lived in stripy cotton tops and baggy dark coloured jeans to hide bogies and food stains, we hadn’t had our hair cut in a while, we just didn’t feel like we used to pre-baby and were waiting to look and feel carefree.

But these are just excuses...

Motherhood has changed life and motherhood has changed us. It’s time to accept it, embrace it and love ourselves a little more. We are doing a bloody good job and it’s time us mothers get in the photos and get it all recorded! I also feel that we, as a generation, have become reliant on our phone cameras and are used to

a) opening the front camera on our phone and seeing us in the most unflattering way (double chiiinnnssss and large nostrils anyone?)

or

b) only seeing our crappy quality phone photos.

We are becoming so used to this and thinking that what we have seen is reality. It really isn’t. No wonder people are slapping a filter on to make themselves feel better!

In my own life, I began to make sure that my husband held the camera more and took photos of me with the children. They were okay but never really print-worthy because let’s face it, taking good photos requires skill - not just an expensive camera or a filter. So, I bit the bullet and I had professional photos taken of us all. I am so glad I did. They hang proudly on the wall by the stairs. I invested in it. I invested in quality. I invested in something that would look good, make me feel good when I looked at it and last forever. Just as my client had done with me.

We do a lot for our children, pretty much everything. Getting photos for them to cherish forever is one thing that we should also do too.

Our kids couldn’t care less about our hair or what we are wearing. They don’t see us as fat either. They see mum. The one they can’t live without. The one they love beyond reason.

The other day my daughter said that she loves seeing me laugh. If I comb my greasy hair and change my top my son says I look beautiful. They melt my heart.

They also both have my love for looking back through photos and as much as they are fascinated with themselves. They wonder where there are if they aren't in the photo, and they look for me. Just like they do when I go to hide in the toilet.

Mothers, get in the photos. Get some clean clothes on and wash your hair. Put on a little mascara if you must and get some photos with your child. Give them something they will have forever, long after you have gone. Be brave and do it for them because ‘sometimes later, becomes never.’

Leave the excuses at home for half an hour and come grab a coffee with me and I can talk to you about mini sessions I offer for mothers and their children. My ‘mummy and me’ sessions are half-hour family photography sessions of you hanging out with your kids anywhere in Rutland. All in the same natural signature style which you can read more about in my blog: Rutland Water family photography

So come on mothers, get in the photos. Contact me or better yet, come on partners, families and friends of mothers... come and get your loved one the perfect gift of a family photography session.